His Eyes
by Ronette
Summary: Lucky (JJ) and Liz reunion. Enjoy!


As a die-hard L&L2 fan, what I can only dream would happen on the show. Don't know where this is coming from, I just felt the muse. Enjoy and please send me any feedback!  
  
Kristi  
  
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His Eyes  
  
Liz looked up when she heard the door open, surprised when she saw who it was, "Lucky? What are you doing back here? Did you forget something?" He didn't answer her. He just stood there, a single tear threatening to fall from his eye. He seemed to be drinking in her image, as if it had been forever since he last saw her. 'But it's only been a few minutes. What's going on?' She started towards him and began to notice that a few things were different since she last saw him. His hair was longer, and darker like it hasn't seen the sun in awhile. And his shoulders sagged like they had the weight of ten worlds resting upon them. Above his right eyebrow there was a faint scar that she didn't remember. His clothes were different, too. She continued, "Why did you change clothes, Lucky? And what happened to your face..." His gentle fingers on her lips silenced her questions and she felt her breath catch in her throat as he moved to caress her cheek. Forced thru his mouth like the softest whisper of a dove's wings he cooed, "Elizabeth." His warm breath hit her face and her gaze shot to his eyes searching for her answers. She gasped at what they told her.  
  
Her trembling hands covered her mouth and she backed quickly away from him knocking into her easel and sending paints and brushes crashing to the ground. "No! No!" she choked out, the pain hitting her fresh as the scab was pulled from the hidden, but not healed wound that cut deep into her soul. A wound that had existed ever since Lucky had admitted that he didn't love her. It had always been there, throbbing, reminding her constantly of what she had lost, what had been ripped away from her. She turned her back not wanting to see his eyes anymore. "Why are you looking at me like that?" the question, accusation tore from her throat. "Elizabeth," he started again and laid a warm hand on her shoulder. She cowered under his touch, she didn't have the strength to run from him. She didn't have the will. 'His eyes. God, his eyes.' They had looked at her like they had done so many times before. She could see them vividly, gazing down at her from his higher perch on the boxcar, cast her way as he escaped out her bedroom window into the Port Charles night. It was a look that no matter her bold words she'd never been able to stop dreaming about, to stop yearning for. Love was shining out of his eyes. Her love. The love that had understood her and kept her sane when she thought she couldn't go on. The love that had made her believe in life again. The love that she'd returned unwaveringly every day of his 'death' and then held on to faithfully every day since he'd returned to her. Until the one day, the one terrible day he'd looked at her, his eyes empty, and he'd told her that the love was gone. The love that he'd promised would forever be hers was gone.  
  
The realization hit her hard and the anger hit her harder. She wrenched herself from his light hold and stared him down, the rage flashing in her eyes, "How dare you, Lucky! You don't just get to decide to love me again. You can't do this to me!" He wasn't a coward, he soaked in her scorn as if he deserved it. He held her gaze and answered, "I never stopped loving you, Elizabeth. I never stopped." "Don't lie to me!" she spat. "I would never lie to you, Elizabeth," he said and the pure honesty in his voice nearly cut her in two. The derisive laugh erupted before she had the chance to stop it. This was all so surreal, like some sort of bizarre mind-trip. Perhaps she'd gone crazy. She could go join her once- promised-to-be-mother-in-law in the looney bin. Yeah, a nice, happy, dysfunctional family reunion. Liz hurried across the room, away from his oppressive presence and gripped the window sill tightly. She needed to calm her racing thoughts before they overwhelmed her and she did surrender to the void that had claimed Laura. How could he still have this effect on her? She'd thought she had this addiction of her's under control, but she could feel it coming back. She shouldn't have gone with him on this latest adventure to save his Dad. Like a promised last fix from a syringe that had been just a little too full. Her breaths were coming faster and she could feel the knot forming in her throat as her tears threatened to fall.  
  
But just a quickly as the panic started to set in she felt it slip away all due to the steady hand that now rested at the base of her neck, kneading her tired and worried muscles. She hadn't even heard him move behind her, but there he was, comforting her like he'd done so many times before. The soothing pressure from his massage, the secure blanket of his musky scent surrounding her, the unspoken promise that he would catch her if she needed to fall. He hadn't been here like this for her since before the fire and she found herself reveling in the moment. Of course, it had been a while since he had been the strong one. It seemed like she had forever been picking up his pieces. Why did he pick now to change? What was so special about this point in their lives. She let him continue his ministrations as she thought. Just earlier he'd been here with her laughing and joking and having a good time. He'd offered to walk her to her studio from Kelly's since he was on his way to his Dad's club to pick up some invoices. But it had seemed no more special to her than if it was Nikolas offering to accompany her on his way back to Wyndamere. But now, Lucky's whole being had changed. 'It's like... It's like he's a different person.' He heart stopped at that thought. As though he could read her mind his hand stopped it's magic and he uttered two simple words, "It's true."  
  
She turned to face him slowly, not daring to get her hopes up no matter what he assured her. She reached up and brushed a lock of hair away that had fallen across his forehead. The brush-worn pad of her thumb softly traced the revealed scar and the crease of worry that jagged across his brow. Bringing up her other hand she let the backs of her fingers slowly trail down the side of his face, his evening stubble scratching her delicate skin. She grazed his hoop earring startling her since he'd changed to a stud years ago. His eyelids fluttered at her touches but his look never wavered willing with every fiber of his being that she would figure out everything he needed her to know. Liz felt the joy start to bubble inside of her at what was being discovered here in her studio on this quiet night. "You came back to me," she whispered, a tear falling from her eye and stopping to rest on her pale cheek. Lucky's heart-shaped lips erupted in a smile at her words, "I promised you forever and the day after that, didn't I?" He swept the tear away from her face and leaned his head against her's, "I love you, Elizabeth. I love you so much. And I'm sorry tonight had to happen like this, causing you so much pain. But, I had to know that you could tell the difference. That some inner part of you knew and would tell your soul tonight that I was the real Lucky. Your Lucky that's never spent a second of the past four and a half years wanting to be anywhere but with you. I'm so sorry for all the hurt that bastard has caused you." "Oh God, Lucky," she said, reaching to clasp his hands with hers, "I'm sorry for ever believing that he could be you. What was I thinking?" "No, no, Elizabeth," he hugged her tight, enveloping her in his strong arms, "Never apologize for not giving up on our love." The guilt hit her like a ton of bricks and she pulled back from him ashamed by the faith he had for her. A faith that she had failed. She looked at him sadly, not wanting to admit the truth, but knowing she could never keep this from him. "But I did give up on our love, Lucky," it was so hard to go on, to utter the facts of her betrayal, "I cared about someone else. I turned my back on you and I didn't try hard enough to keep our love alive. I settled for what I could get. It wasn't perfect, but I was selfish and I just wanted to be... I don't know, I just, I just wanted to matter to someone again. I was tired of being pitied by you, well by him I mean. By everyone. I even started to believe that you never really understood me. I started to doubt what we had shared all those years ago."  
  
He closed his eyes when she was done talking and she feared for the moment that he would open them. She didn't know if she could take the hurt and pain that would pour out replacing the love. A love that might be gone from her forever now thanks to her thoughtless and stupid actions. The seconds stretched out like years seeming to fill the ever increasing space that began to separate her heart from his. She swore she could feel him slipping away and she wanted to scream in frustration. Finally he looked upon her again and her knees nearly gave out. There was pain there, and hurt, but in no way did they begin to overshadow the love that she was beginning to get used to seeing there again. Could he possibly forgive her for what she had done? It finally all caught up with her and she started to slide to the floor, but before she could fall he had safely caught her and placed her on her sofa. He sat silently beside her and she knew he was trying to find the right words.  
  
Unable to let herself waste anymore time between them she grabbed his hands wanting to be able to hold him for as long as she still could. He took a deep breath and gripped her hands tightly as he began, "I won't lie to you, Elizabeth. The mere thought of another man kissing you, holding you, loving you drives me crazy, but I can't fault you for trying to find some comfort from being alone. It's so horrible to be all alone." The anguish that permeated his last statement silenced her breath and she couldn't stop the tears from falling. What had he been thru all these years? He continued, "As for turning away from your love for me, well, I can't hold surviving against you either, Elizabeth. You've had to deal with horrible circumstances. I couldn't imagine going on in this life without your love with me always and the fact that you've managed thinking you didn't have mine just stresses again for me how strong you really are. But turning away from the love is all you did, you have to believe that. You never stopped feeling it, you've just kept it hidden to keep the pain from swallowing you up. You could never stop loving me just like I could never stop loving you." The tears were wracking her body now and she leaned against his solid chest holding on for support, holding on for strength, holding on for life. She began to speak and it came out so quietly that he had to lean his head down to hear her, "I do love you, Lucky. It's a love so strong that it scares me sometimes. Because I'm not right without it, I'm not whole. You're back with me and I feel a completeness I haven't felt in so long. We're better together than we are apart, and we can get thru whatever is coming are way. We'll be strong for each other." He lifted her chin so he could see her eyes, "You know it's Helena. This imposter, the horrible situation my Mom is in, she's caused it all." Liz nodded and put on a brave smile letting him know with just a look that they would fight this together. And he didn't question her, he didn't tell her it was too dangerous, he just smiled back so happy that he didn't have to be alone anymore. Neither on of them had to be. He leaned down and sealed their love with a kiss. 


End file.
